Damn!

i was told by a friend that i've a short span memory. She told me it is a good thing since i will having difficulties in remembering all those misery and nightmares. I try to think that she is right, I do have that kind of condition. But the thing is, i don't totally forget. Memories doesn't simply erased by itself. I just kept on with the living until the VISIT.

Aha, what is the so called VISIT. Well, it is something that i refer on difficult situation where suddenly i felt like exploding. Mostly, the symptom comes with tiredness until it mutates to became hatred to my own self. I hate the little sparks, the thing which is fragment of memories that bring me down to shit hole. Sometimes it's like driving meself into insanity.

How do i get by with it? ciggarates, lots of ciggarates. A bed with a blanket does help too. and for the dark moment, i let myself become nothing. total emptiness. a moment of silent for the wound that have been keep all this while. A purpose could help also, as long, it's not about me. I hate to think about myself. I know how stupid it sound. It just, i feel tired about me. Let's have more about you and everbody.

Cheerssss