Another working sunday, I think, after working in this line for several years, I've lost my sense of weekend. Much worse than that, I also can't tell the differences between day and night. It's quite phatetic actually, when your biology clock fails. Up until now, I still remember the 'one' word that my friend text message to me... 'bangun'. Just that one word, and i feel miserable for the whole day. I guess they realized that there's no more use of my bragging my bad habit of waking late. shucks...
There's no acurate reason that I can explain. At first, I tried to blame the weather. Well, it just didn't feel right. Later on, I said, it is because of the nightmares that I had. Then again, it's too childish. By this time being, I just kept silent about it. I know it's my fault because it's all over my shoulder. There's nothing else to blame but myself. And if there's changes, it got to come from inside me.
Maybe, well just maybe, the reason why I'm always trap in this situation is because I want to remain static. Every new phases brings new puzzles. And I'm really suck as a beginner. God knows how many times I've fallen in my steps. Every new chapter, I kept on learning from my mistakes. and I'm tired of being laughed. Sometimes I just want to grab a gun and shoot all the clowns. However, as I learn that i can't cheat, I learn to accept it.... just one of those days out of millions that come from it.
In abstract way, I always hope that everything goes well. I've grown to become a pessimistic but it didn't stop me from having faith. Maybe we just unlucky when stumble into hard situation. Ain't we all. Lately, i'm getting used talking about it to the moon and the stars, I look at the cloud and i pictured it as a painting hanging in the sky, and my favourite moment is the magical sunset. I take it all as a glimpse of happiness, just to get through time that kept on chasing from behind.
Good Night and Sweet Dreams...
*Ps: try to listen Jack Johnson "What You Thought You Need'', I guess you know how it feels.
There's no acurate reason that I can explain. At first, I tried to blame the weather. Well, it just didn't feel right. Later on, I said, it is because of the nightmares that I had. Then again, it's too childish. By this time being, I just kept silent about it. I know it's my fault because it's all over my shoulder. There's nothing else to blame but myself. And if there's changes, it got to come from inside me.
Maybe, well just maybe, the reason why I'm always trap in this situation is because I want to remain static. Every new phases brings new puzzles. And I'm really suck as a beginner. God knows how many times I've fallen in my steps. Every new chapter, I kept on learning from my mistakes. and I'm tired of being laughed. Sometimes I just want to grab a gun and shoot all the clowns. However, as I learn that i can't cheat, I learn to accept it.... just one of those days out of millions that come from it.
In abstract way, I always hope that everything goes well. I've grown to become a pessimistic but it didn't stop me from having faith. Maybe we just unlucky when stumble into hard situation. Ain't we all. Lately, i'm getting used talking about it to the moon and the stars, I look at the cloud and i pictured it as a painting hanging in the sky, and my favourite moment is the magical sunset. I take it all as a glimpse of happiness, just to get through time that kept on chasing from behind.
Good Night and Sweet Dreams...
*Ps: try to listen Jack Johnson "What You Thought You Need'', I guess you know how it feels.
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